Depression- okay so maybe thats to the extreme i’m just sad. To be honest i think i’m quite pathetic, recently i’ve been trying so, so hard to get your attention. it doesnt work you don’t notice me. I try to get everyones attention, don’t get me wrong i’m not faking my sadness i am sad…. maybe i’m just seeing who my real friends are. I think kelly is amazing shes the one that can make me laugh. I guess thats whats important in a great friend.

Justin… Why why why. Am I that ugly?… I know anita is so much prettier, skinnier, smarter than me i get it. Ah. Yes never mind im just not good enough. I guess i will never be.

I just want someone who will love me like louis loves jamie, like sunny loves linny. Like how justin loved anita… I just want him, really, really want him